This morning…oh, this morning. I should have known when I started off the day by pouring my Cheerios into my tea mug instead of my cereal bowl.
Around 7:15, I’m on my way to work and I get a text on my phone:
Unfamiliar number: Hey baby
Clearly, this text was not meant for me. Still, I respond:
Me: Though I appreciate the endearment, I think you have the wrong number.
Five minutes later:
Unfamiliar Number: You sound really nice. I’m Brenda. (I’ve changed the name, just in case this person would happen to come across this and get embarrassed…though somehow I get the impression that “Brenda” is embarrassed by very little.)
Brenda: I like the way you talk.
I'm feeling a certain sense of admiration for Brenda. She seems like a real “lemons to lemonade” kind of girl. A wrong number isn’t going to stop her from trying to make a deep human connection.
Me: Well, Brenda, I’m female and married. Have a great Friday!
Brenda: You to Hun. You are so cool! Have a great wonderfull day! (note: I’ve kept the misspellings in, as I feel it pays tribute to the rustic charm of her dialect.)
Thirty minutes later, I’m in the midst of texting my friend Valayre and telling her all about my conversation with Brenda when I get another text:
Brenda: Are you bi?
OMG. CAN’T. BREATHE. LAUGHING. SO. HARD.
Me to Val: OMG SHE JUST ASKED IF I’M BI OMFG
Val: OMG. What are you going to tell her?
Me: What do you think? I’m scheduling my first clandestine lesbian interlude as we speak!
Me again: J/K of course, I told her no, sorry.
But Brenda is no woman scorned:
Brenda: You are awsome!
As much as I’ve laughed—and continued to laugh all day—I think we could all learn something from Brenda. I mean, talk about rolling with your punches! Wrong number? Hey, love the one you’re (texting) with. Wrong sex? It’s cool. Let’s compromise! Still rejected? That’s okay. Because you are AWSOME.